The Magic of Incompetence

I was going to go into more detail about this, but won't -- not because it's gross, but just because I still have some lingering shred of respect for the value of your time. But I'll say this: My toilet's been acting up, and I'm almost certain that I've found a way of fixing it that has nothing to do with an actual solution. It involves me tinkering with it in a completely (even creatively) ineffectual way and then -- this is where you'll have to trust me -- the toilet inexplicably curing itself out of what I could swear is pity.

I never thought I'd use the word toilet twice (now three times) in the same post, but hey, live and learn.