A Smiling Orange and Mr. Met

My friend T. has issued a challenge to his "friends and allies" to join him in blogging at least once a day for the next 30 days. And I'm not one to back down from a challenge. (This is not true; if you so much as look at me funny I'm likely to run screaming. More accurate to say that I'm not one to back down from this challenge.)

I'll start light because I'm a bit rusty, as you might imagine. So let's start the streak with two looks at one of my favorite subjects: mascots. This is from ESPN's account of West Virginia's 70-33 shellacking of Clemson in Wednesday night's Orange Bowl:

But safety [Darwin] Cook made the pivotal play by returning a fumble 99 yards for a touchdown to break the game open...

After Cook crossed the goal line, he gleefully leaped on mascot Obie, a smiling orange, and they both tumbled to the turf. Obie rose unhurt and resumed her duties.

Cook and Obie met on the field after the game and shared a hug.

"I didn't know you were a girl," he told the mascot. "I apologize."

Video of the incident, and the orange mascot pretending to vomit into a trash can on the sidelines afterward, is here.

And then this, from a New York Times piece today about Mr. Met, the mascot of the New York Mets:

The Mets maintain a “no comment” position about Mr. Met, apparently to maintain an aura about his life. They refused last week to discuss the precise size of his head or what it is made of; how many people have played him; or details of his endorsement work. A spokesman for Mr. Met declined to comment other than to say, “Mr. Met never speaks.”

The article is accompanied by a slide show, including an image of Mr. Met with Bill Clinton, and another with this caption: "Conan O’Brien’s late-night show performed a sketch in which the Phillie Phanatic gunned down a suicidal Mr. Met."

The Bad & the Ugly

It wasn't just TK who prodded me this week (see below). My old buddy "Dez" also sent along a link that he knew would get me going: a list from Fox Sports of the 14 "dumbest mascots." There are four Olympic mascots on the list, because those things tend to be demented, purposeless creations with names like "Wenlock and Mandeville" that were designed in the visual equivalent of Esperanto and would send any sane person screaming.

I think they're a little hard on Otto the Orange (at left) from Syracuse, writing: "It doesn't get much dumber than a giant orange ball. And to think, Syracuse was also considering a wolf and a lion as its mascot when it picked Otto in 1995." First of all, they are the "Syracuse Orange," and as vague as that is, an orange something would seem to fit the bill. Also, Wikipedia calls Otto a gender-neutral "anthropomorphic orange, wearing a large blue hat and blue pants." And I ask, what is wrong with that?

The site is not too hard, however, on Hip Hop, the Philadelphia 76ers' mascot ("It's a rapping bunny. 'Nuff said.") or on "Q," the truly terrifying mascot of soccer's San Jose Earthquakes:

Not So Dandy

How did I not know this? Good question. In the late 1970s, the Yankees introduced a mascot named Dandy:

[T]he Yankees agreed to lease Dandy for three years and $30,000 and made plans to unveil him in late July.

Then disaster struck.

Want to know whom to blame for Dandy's premature demise? Look no further than the San Diego Chicken and Lou Piniella.

On July 10, 1979, the Chicken—on sabbatical from the Padres, his regular employer—was working for the Seattle Mariners at the Kingdome, where he threw a hex on Yankees pitcher Ron Guidry as he warmed up. Mr. Piniella, the Yankees' left fielder at the time, considered this to be in poor taste, so he chased the Chicken and, lacking apparent success, fired his glove at him in a fit of rage.

In the wake of that fiasco, Mr. Steinbrenner supported Mr. Piniella by telling reporters that mascots had no place in baseball—this, just two weeks before the Yankees were to introduce their own.

Steinbrenner banished Dandy to the upper deck, where he roamed for a short while before going extinct. It didn't help that Dandy's mustache was meant to resemble that of Thurman Munson, the team's guiding light, who died in a plane crash just a few days after Dandy made his first appearance.

Read the whole thing.

(Via Cardboard Gods)

Mascot Reboot

Trinity College in Connecticut recently introduced a new Bantam mascot. Whether it’s an improvement on the old one is up for debate, but in any case, the school made this short film to chronicle the changing of the guard. (Thanks to CB.)

Goldy Prays

It's been a while since I've had mascot news to share. This nugget's pretty good. The University of Minnesota's mascot, Goldy Gopher, got himself in hot water last week. When Minny's opponent, Penn State, took the field, defensive end Jerome Hayes knelt in the end zone to pray. Goldy knelt, too. Fairly mild stuff, but charges of mocking religion led Minnesota to apologize for Goldy's behavior. The video is pretty funny. But the ensuing quote is even funnier:

According to the report, Hayes said he has seen video of the moment, and that he's not bothered by it -- although teammates have told him "the Gopher got the best of me."

Mascots Rumble, Sort Of

I first heard about this mascot fight over the weekend. I was excited to write about it, but then the video let me down. It's clear that this wasn't as thrilling as it first sounded. But still, one mascot was paid $100 by a fan (my kind of fan) to rip the mustache off another mascot, with just seven seconds left on the clock and the game hanging in the balance. That's not nothing.

I feel like the one mascot backs off before it can really amount to a brawl, because he came to and realized that he wasn't encased in foam like the other guy. A bit more embarrassing to be in clear view, just a dude wearing chaps, fighting a big blue bull.

Busted-Up Bango

It's been a while since I've had some mascot news to report. At the NBA's recent All-Star weekend, Milwaukee Bucks' mascot Bango was standing on the rim (never smart) when another mascot banked in a shot from half-court. Off of Bango's groin.

That's actually not the bad part for Bango. He then hammed it up, falling through the rim, in what one source called "a sickening twisting of limbs, hooves and antlers." (That same source includes a great photo of Bango with its coverage.)

Long story short, Bango tore his ACL and needs surgery. Watch the clip below, and tell me that mascots don't earn their keep. I wouldn't call it "sickening," more like "inappropriately hilarious," as Bango rolls around on the floor at the end, nobly picking himself up and hopping toward the locker room for emergency care.



(Via Dez)

"Just putting on the costume, walking around and waving, isn’t enough."

I think you'll find this instructional video very helpful. With the declining economy, one never knows when one will be forced into the mascot industry, an industry that, as John Maynard Keynes emphasized time and again, never slumps. This guide, produced, I'm guessing, in 1983 or so, was sent to me by a friend -- another JW -- who always keeps his eye out for solid mascot material for me. It includes quotes like, "Some kids are a little hesitant about letting Chuck E. touch them."

Smart kids.

Harry's Fired Up

For those of you not paying attention to the NBA playoffs, a quick preface to this mascot-related story. The Atlanta Hawks went 37-45 during the regular season, the Boston Celtics 66-16. The Celtics easily won the first two games of the teams' opening-round playoff series, as expected. The Hawks won the next two in Atlanta, which is stunning. This note was sent to Bill Simmons, an ESPN writer, from a former intern of his, a Hawks fan. Enjoy:

This series makes no sense. I was at both home games, and I'm still trying to process it. For instance, you know how teams gather in a circle before tip-off and hype themselves up around one guy yelling in the middle, be it 'Sheed, KG, Shaq, the Bulls' "What time is it?" chant, etc.? It's a storied tradition. So on Saturday night I look down and see the Hawks doing the same, and I'm feeling good . . . only then I suddenly realize the guy in the middle is Harry the Hawk, going berserk and presumably yelling muffled profanities through his enormous beak. It was horrifying - I think I may have dropped my beer in slow-mo. at that point I would have laid down a million dollars on us getting swept. And then we reel off two of the most inspired playoff wins in team history. It's crazy.

Needless to say, I'll be crestfallen if someone didn't capture this on video. For now, there is a montage of Harry highlights out there, and it's pretty entertaining.

My Kind of Wedding Reception

To take us into the weekend, a clip found and sent along by my friend The Comish (sic). It seems that a couple got married and Mr. Met showed up at the reception. The video of him dancing is the truly priceless part. After about 1:15, you can stop watching. But until that point, be riveted:

Billy Cub, Still Dissed

I recently wrote about Billy Cub, better known as the guy who wants to be the official mascot for the Cubs but mostly stands outside Wrigley Field in a bear costume, drumming up support for his cause and occasionally hallucinating about evil crows and magical berries. Well, from the keeper of the excellent blog Chicago Mets Fan comes photographic evidence that Billy's still at it:

Mascots (and Pac Man's Better Half) Near the Amusement Park

A friend was kind enough to take me to Coney Island tonight for a Brooklyn Cyclones game. They beat the Aberdeen IronBirds 12-6. I spent a solid part of the night -- and I wish I was lying as much as you do -- playing Ms. Pac Man. They had the arcade game on the concourse, and the fan who has the highest score at the end of the season will win the machine. Being a Ms. Pac Man junkie for most of my life, this seemed too good an opportunity to pass up. When I heard that the high score so far is 568,000, I realized that it was an opportunity perfectly worth passing up. I consider myself pretty good at the game, but that score is unattainable. Still, I took my shot (gotta have my fix), and I reached about 160,000.

Oh, and there were mascots. (The baseball was fine -- lots of offense -- but minor league games are often as much about things like video games and mascots.) This is Pee Wee, the "younger" of the team's mascots:


Pee Wee's costume has seen better days. He looks like an old favorite doll that you find flattened in the back of your closet when you're 19.

And this is Sandy, Pee Wee's older brother, or whatever. I think they're seagulls?


And this is Sandy about to devour me. This was not staged:

Mascot Outcast

Jason W., a good friend and my source for almost all late-breaking mascot news, points me to this thread at a Chicago Cubs message board. (Scroll down just a bit for the story.)

It seems there's someone in Chicago trying to become the official mascot of the Cubs, but Wrigley Field doesn't allow costumed persons to enter the stadium. (What if there's a riot and Batman needs to get in to break it up?) According to the sympathetic fan who posted the message:

He has spent thousands of dollars on this costume (which is equipped with a complete cooling system). He has been let into Miller Park (in Milwaukee) with the costume, but is NOT allowed in Wrigley.

So this guy walks around outside the stadium during games, taking pictures with fans and pleading his case. He also has a web site, where you can sign a petition urging his official recognition. The site also features, um, a back story for "Billy Cub":

Billy Cub lives in the magical land of Belonore Ivy. One day Billy is out playing catch with his father and a lost dog walks by looking for his ball. Billy decides he will help Walter, the lost dog, find his ball. The task seams easy as Billy gathers many of his friends to help. The young animals discover that the evil Shadow Crows have taken Walter’s ball. The Shadow Crows are feared by all animals of Belonore Ivy. The evil Shadow Crows threaten the peaceful animals way of life. They continue to destroy the magical berries that the animals of Belonore Ivy depend on for their food source.

Errrr.... Maybe Wrigley has the right idea here.

Besieged Mascot Turns to Abby

Dear Abby fields a question from a mascot this week. Well, he's less of a mascot than a "professional costume wearer." And it's less of a question than just an imploration to stop beating the crap out of him:

I am in costume for about an hour or so before I can take breaks. It gets hot and sweaty inside these costumes. I have a limited field of vision and can't see many of the oncoming attacks. Even if I saw each one, I would not be able to say anything to stop or deflect these random attacks. What I do is have a paid "helper" walk beside me. This is now discouraging such actions by adults and children.

(Tip of the hat to friend JW for the link.)

A Noteworthy New Mascot

My friend JW (not me, though I am a friend to myself) passed along this piece about a new minor league baseball team in Grand Prairie, which is between Dallas and Fort Worth. The team is going to be called the Air Hogs.

Evidently, Grand Prairie has a thriving aviation industry, and Air Hogs is a slang term used by military pilots. The fan who suggested the name in an online contest gives good quote:

Mr. Hasty, a self-proclaimed Google addict, said he searched the Internet for mascots. Then he typed in "aviator" and up popped pictures of "air hogs."

"These cool little logos came up of hogs with tusks and goggles, and they looked real tough," Mr. Hasty said. "I wanted a tough hog, one that wouldn't be mistaken for a pig."

Got that? They're not a bunch of pansy pigs.

The team begins play in 2008, and I imagine that's when I'll see its new stadium for the first time in person. If ASWOBA is still going strong then, there will be a full report and photos. If you're half as excited as I am by that prospect, you're very, very excited.

Today in Mascot Awesomeness

Presenting Blowie, the mascot of the Columbia Blowfish:


(Via Deadspin, which offers more great details about Blowie here.)

Recent Mascot News

Because I've made my insane fascination with mascots perfectly clear on the blog, and because my friends are very generous, I'm now regularly sent e-mails with links and stories about our costumed brethren. From the long-lost Dezmond, once a commenter of extraordinary, entertaining, and demented regularity, comes word about the Indiana Pacers' mascot being sued:

After taking part in the free-throw contest, the lawsuit states that Jackson began to leave the basketball court but was tackled from behind by the team's mascot, "Boomer," a 6-foot-tall blue cat with gold whiskers.

Then my friend Jason W., the wisest of men, sent me two video links. The first is something I saw on Deadspin a while back and meant to post then. It's only a representation of a mascot, but its quick downfall is quite entertaining. This video begins with all the background you need to enjoy it:



There are echoes of recent history in that clip, so one can only hope that Columbus is not soon torn asunder by civil war.

Finally, Jason also sent along word of the Oakland A's mascot, Stompers, who's evidently quite the dancer. Here he is outside the stadium with some fans:



This link features that video as well as another, more extended and impressive dance at a club. More importantly, though, the story describes Stompers as "getting hyphy" with the fans. So I followed the linked phrase over to the Urban Dictionary, which was worth the time:

Main Entry: hyphy
Pronunciation: "HIGH-fee"
Function: adjective

Etymology: San Francisco Bay Area, shortened perhaps from English dialect "hyperactive"; other sources cite a combination of "hype" and "fly." Popularized by E-40 and the Federation's song "Hyphy" (2004); first known use on record by Keak Da Sneak in 1998 (on "Cool," from his LP Sneakacidle).
1 : dangerous and irrational: CRAZY;
2 : amusingly eccentric; without inhibition: GOOFY

I'd love to know how long it would take after reading that for Samuel Johnson's head to explode from incomprehension. An entry further down on the page offers this slight variation, which I think I prefer: "1. Go stupid, dummy, retarted."

Mascot Encounter

It's a long story -- involving MySpace or Facebook or MeMeMe, or one of those sites that allow you to spend your days living inside the equivalent of a high school yearbook -- but a friend at work recently showed me a few photos from a trip she took to Madison last fall. Among these photos was a shot of her with the Milwaukee Brewers' sausage mascots. Needless to say, I was very angry that I hadn't heard about this sooner, since my love of all things mascot is known around the globe. In order to make up for her negligence, she allowed me to post the best of the bunch:

Senior Citizens vs. Mascots

I originally meant to write a long post about a recent trip to see the Staten Island Yankees play the Brooklyn Cyclones, which included my first trip on the Staten Island Ferry and a strange run-in with a large group of British tourists who were crazily celebrating on said ferry after the game as if the UK had just won the World Cup. Very bizarre.

But while my memory has faded to the point where a longer post would be even less entertaining than it normally would, I do want to share one anecdote. And only partly because it involves mascots.

Like all minor league games, those in Staten Island evidently involve a whole lot of distracting people between innings. Included in this effort are three bovine mascots, pictured below:



I'll get to the point. The game was a very well played pitchers' duel, and when the Yankees were trying to clinch a 1-0 win in the ninth, the mascots were cheering them on from the top of the dugout, as in the photos above. There was a very old man at the end of our row who was clearly agitated by having his view blocked by overly enthusiastic foam cattle. I took a friend's camera and moved in to get a closer shot of the mascots. As I was focusing the lens, the codger got my attention and gestured toward the phone. "Excuse me," he said, with a strange air of optimism, "does that operate a death ray?"

Sparty Was Robbed

I'm falling asleep on the job. As you know, I like to be your source for mascot news. It's right up there in the subtitle, even before geography. But somewhere i have never travelled has beaten me to the story of the 2006 inductees to the Mascot Hall of Fame.

Let's start, of course, with the glorious realization that this Hall of Fame exists. Some friends of mine have made small noises recently about moving to Philadelphia. It appears the Mascot shrine is located there. I might have to start apartment hunting.

The Hall's web site says that the institution "is in its infant stages and needs your help to grow. Do your part and receive some cool gifts along with voting rights in the induction process." (Emphasis mine.)

Huh? I can vote?? Little ol' me, entrusted with such a weighty duty? I could emerge from a Philadelphia voting booth and piously raise my ink-smeared finger to allow a New York Times photographer to capture the miracle that is democracy? Rest assured, I'm investigating this possibility.

Perhaps if I lend my voice to the chorus, I can rectify miscarriages of justice like the one described on somewhere i have never travelled, in which the University of Delaware's YoUDee -- a "fightin' chicken" -- was voted in over Michigan State's Sparty. The nomination process includes submitting a three-minute video of the mascot in action. Here is Sparty's reel. These moments pass pretty quickly, but I particularly like the 1:12 mark, where he crowds out a couple of students on the top step of an academic building, and 1:28, where he, perhaps unadvisedly, seems to be manning a phone at a suicide hotline center.