Had a Long Week? It's Tranq Dart Time

I was flipping through The Onion on the subway two nights ago, and had to close it, because I started laughing so hysterically at this piece that I was going to humiliate myself in front of a car full of strangers. The piece itself is pretty good, but it's not even that funny by Onion standards. There was just something about that headline and that mug shot that killed me, and after that I was going to increasingly crack up at whatever followed.