Wednesday, October 19, 2005

AP Headline/Story of the Day

This one's really worth reprinting in whole, with my comments in bold:

130-Pound Buck Runs Amok in Supermarket

READING, Pa. (AP) This confirms my suspicion that Pennsylvania is a potentially intriguing, kind of crazy, and perhaps randomly deadly place to live -- A 130-pound deer crashed through the front window of a supermarket and ran amok for more than an hour before it was tranquilized by state game officials and removed. No one was hurt.

The eight-point buck emerged from a wooded area, struck a parked tow truck and then jumped through the window of a Weis supermarket in Exeter Township, Berks County, around 5:15 p.m. Monday. This deer is pissed.

It ran past a cash register to the rear of the store, crashed through the meat-counter display case and then headed toward the bread aisle at the other end of the store.

Two game officers and four Exeter police barricaded the deer with shopping carts, and shot it with tranquilizer darts. Is it just me, or does this whole incident seem like an outtake from the supermarket chase scene in Raising Arizona? Weis officials reopened the store Monday night.

Pennsylvania Game Commission Supervisor Jack Lincoln said the deer would be euthanized because of the chemicals used to tranquilize it.

"We can't take the chance of a hunter harvesting and eating that meat," he said. Yes, thinks the deer, Now more than ever, please look out for the hunters.

Deer become more active this time of the year because they are entering their mating season. This really speaks to how much more awful the entire thing could've been.

Cashier Kelsey Bracken said she was grateful she wasn't at her cash register at the time.

"I would have died," Bracken said. "It ran right through (register) five." I can't put my finger on it, but there's something about this quote that makes it seem like an effective country-music lyric.



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